My Own Invention

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check out my new photography blog, I update it everyday!

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Smells

The fact that my bed doesn’t smell like you when I wake up makes me upset

little people.

I hung out with my favorite little person yesterday; my baby sister.  I took her to a fashion show and she was beyond excited.   Apparently she’d spent all day telling her friends at school that she was going to a fashion show.

We went, and she was completely floored by it.  She kept saying, “Tay, this is so awesome” and you could see in her eyes how much fun she was legitimately having.

She even got a chance to walk the runway, and everyone of course cheered for her and went crazy because she’s 10.  She won the walk off and had 2 tickets to a hair show. 

I’m so glad I thought to take her, not only because it was amazing to see her having such a good time, but because I hope she’ll remember this and keep doing well in school so she can go to college.

It  felt good to just be with her yesterday, it felt good to let her into my world, even if it was only for a few hours.

She has this uncanny way of making me smile, and i don’t know how i made it so long without her.

She made my day amazing yesterday, and i grateful to her for it.

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Sweat it out;

there is something so nice about starting the day off with a little bit of sweat. =]
working out can be so incredibly therapeutic, =]

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I’m feeling good today,

because I’ve decided to no longer dwell in darkness and unhappiness but instead to know and accept peace.

to completely know and accept it.

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This is the start of something extremely beautiful.

I’m excited to embrace it fullly.

being a big person;

I’m sitting in the library, in the middle of doing work.  I just finished one midterm, and now I’m about to start my next one.  But in the mean time, I’m listening to music and just thinking.

Thinking about what it means to be a big person, an actual adult.  College is ending soon, at least the undergrad part, and i have absolutely no plans or ideas about what to do next.  Maybe it’s just me but being a big person with all these responsibilities and things is a little intimidating.  I keep wondering what if I’m bad at it, or what if I’m not ready. 

I’ve been researching grad schools, but I haven’t in any way made any final decisions or in any way remotely thought about taking the G.R.E.

it’s scary. it really is.

maybe i’m thinking too much into it, but i’m terrified. I really am.

I hope I’m good at it; I hope i can handle it.

day 2.

It’s been one of those days.  I had a small mini breakdown earlier, and could feel myself going into my shell.  I could feel myself not wanting to do anything but hole myself up and wallow.  But I didn’t.  I got out of my room, and while that may not seem like a big deal. It is a step for me.  It’s a beautiful day… one of those sunny autumn days with a cool breeze, and I intend on enjoying every single minute of it.

I’m supposed to be going to see a movie with a friend later today, and I have every intention on making sure that turns out lovely.  My best friend is also coming into town this weekend, and apart from doing work I also have every intention of hangin with her. 

Today has been a little bit of a bad day, but just because it started this way does mean I need to let it end this way.  I am going to get up and make today beautiful.

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I am back;

I have been away for far too long.  In the process of starting my senior year with a full load and working.  I have neglected myself, and boy is it showing.  I no longer do the things I once enjoyed, and have settled into a routine that is meant for someone at least 10 years older than me.  But I’m young.  I have young bones, young muscles, and a young heart.  I need adventure and excitement, and I need to be free.  So I am going to be.  I’m no longer going to just settle into this little routine, I’m going to do something for me every single day.  I am going to do more.  I’m going to be young, and I’m going to enjoy it. 

So.. it looks like this is day one of coming back into my own.  I’m going to be okay, and mostly, I’m going to be happy.   I lead one small life that I can grow to love, and I am.  In the process of that I am going to try and grow to love myself as well. 

This is day one, and i am completely and utterly excited.

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end of the semester

This is it, folks.

I’m practically done.

I have papers flying out of my behind

and exams chasing me everywhere.

basically…school has been eating my soul.

Therefore, i am thankful for a much needed break to chill and be with my family.

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I’m excited to be getting my camera soon, a canon powershot sx20is.

I’m ready to dive head first into photography.

It’s been a very hectic and frustrating day in my world today. Ugh. Please help me Jesus.